I've got this stupid song stuck in my head
I don't know any of the words but I know the tune
Actually I do know some
It's right at the start
It's this little kid saying over and over again
"We're gonna have a party"
Pretty sure its a black song that I get my dance on to
Anyway,
I did five assignments today, I feel kinda proud of my efforts
I don't even know why i'm posting on here
Blah
This doesn't get read

gosh hi
im not sure why im even logged into this one
its old
but i love the name
worst month of my life.
well not my life
but its right up there.

Why are you still reading this old lj?
Come to the dark side...
Aka the new lj!

I'm still L/D (as much as you're againt this)
But for your sake i'll pretend to be L/L
Can I have season six please?
I need new teevee to watch

Guess the episode my subject is from and i'll let you touch my boobs

Haven't you noticed it's been a little quiet on here?

""You'll never find anyone as good for you as I am, to believe in you as much as I do or love you as much!"
So I want to tell a story.

So for a year and a half (off and on) I went out with this guy.
He was my first real anything and I adored him
Ok so we fought and shit was often messy and shitty.
But i still loved him anyway.
Cut to one day in June of last year, he breaks up with me.
Why?
I'm still not really sure.
So he goes out with this 18 year old plain boring girl.
It's like in 'The way we were'
Hubbell marries the boring girl.
"You're girl is lovely Hubbell."
He never understands the reference.
So him and her break up because he doesn't love her and whatever other reasons.
I spent so many hours, days and weeks crying, being a big freakin mess everyday over him.
Does he actually know what I went through in those six months?
Not a fucking clue.

And now? Two years after we've met.
I've done a fucking lot of growing up and I know exactly what I want out of everything I do.
I don't understand why he doesn't want to be with me.
I haven't been given a straight answer.
I come to see him every chance I get,
I organise for us to do fun stuff
I introduce him to my super awesome friends
I'd do pretty much anything he'll ask.
Yet still it isn't enough

I was driving home tonight, crying like an idiot listening to rhianna
You know what I thought?
I hope to fucking god that I don't fall in love too many times in my life because I don't know if I could survive this year after year.

What have I really learnt from this situation?
I love someone who doesn't care about anyone but himself
That I care far too much
One day I will meet someone who will get it
And apprecaite the effort by just saying "thanks for coming over"
And that i'm sure one day he will be an awesome friend to me
When he sorts himself out

There's a beautiful sky tonight and
if you were by my side then we could share it but you are gone.
So come at me with your moon and burn me in the stars
cause nothing matters anymore.
If I could only see you now for about an hour
maybe just a minute
just to ask
What has he got that I don't have?
Is it his brown eyes?
I know blue eyes get boring but I'll wear dark glasses all the time and
hey if you want me to, I'll take a knife to my own bright eyes.
If I could only see you now for about an hour
maybe just a minute
just to ask
what has he got that I don't have?
Is it his brown eyes?
Well, I'll give you a thousand reasons that tonight
you should grant me this one wish.
Like the one year of my life that I gave to you and
now you put me through hell.
You break me up.
I should hate you, but I can't replace you in my heart.
Why am I so pathetic?
I don't get it why you won't return my calls.
Can't you look at me once?
And please if you got a minute,
enjoy this lonely sky with me.
It'll swallow us whole if we only let it.
If I could only see you now for about an hour
maybe just a minute
just to ask
what has he got that I don't have?
Is it his brown eyes?
Well, I'll give a thousand reasons
that tonight you should grant me this one wish.
Like the one year of my life that I gave to you and
now you put me through hell.
You break me up.
If this sky's going to eat us then I'd like to be digested
into a million pieces with you.
I'd love to be scattered to hell with you.
To hell with you.

Don’t trying asking
Cause I never know what to say
Except just everything
A few minutes later in the day
How come everybody else seems so happy
And have intelligent things to say
Cause you know that isn’t me
I think I’d be happy if it was a Saturday

And yeah if only it was Saturday, Saturday
Things would be better in every way, every way
And I would be ok

Cause then I would start
To try to find a way to say
Hey there you are
I need to find a way to be and sound smart
I need to find a way but man it’s so hard
I need to think it’s just not anything will do
I need to think this time
Cause I'm just dying for me and you
To be in phrase that I would always use
In the context like I belong to you

And yea if only it was Saturday, Saturday
Things would be better in every way, every way
And I would be ok
And yea if only it was Saturday, Saturday
Things would be better than was today, is today

I would surely say that
That I’d be here for you
And I hope that you’d be too
And I’ll tell the truth
Say that I need you
Yeah I do
But I know you might not come
But I need you everywhere
Take a breath and close my eyes
And just think about this and say

I need you please to save me
I wanna be your baby
I wanna see you and me
Together this Saturday

And yea if only it was Saturday, Saturday
Things would be better in every way, every way
And I would be ok
And yeah if only it was Saturday, Saturday
Things would be better than was today, is today
And I would surely say
All the times I’ve been afraid
Well I’m gonna make it this Saturday

J


B